Asparagus! You have read it correctly, I said asparagus. Scientists have discovered that the soil on Mars is capable of growing, that's right, asparagus!
Here is a link to the article. http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080627/ts_afp/usspacemars_080627040240;_ylt=AjCrZWGJf3lvw37Q4d2jIDL737YB
This is astounding! The soil environment on Mars will support a vegetable that makes urine smell after you eat it. This poses the question for me, I wonder if Martians eat asparagus and does their urine smell? Does the Phoenix Lander have olfactory capacity? Because that would be the easiest way to determine if there has been or is life on Mars. Take a big ol' wiff of the air and see if it smells like asparagus pee!
Me, I'm not a big asparagus fan quite frankly. In fact I think it is quite a dangerous plant. They are shaped like spears, and it would seem to me that they could put your eye out if you had a sudden stroke while eating one. Maybe that is why there doesn't appear to be Martians on Mars. Perhaps they all got maimed or killed from eating asparagus.
I have a thought, and if anyone steals my idea, I have this as evidence so I wouldn't consider pilfering this one from me. Don't think I won't get all litigious on your ass because I will. I am going to be the first asparagus farmer on Mars. I will make a fortune. Martian grown asparagus, I am sure it will be all the rage in places like L.A., Paris, New York. I can make a killing. And if they won't buy it from me I will just threaten to put their eyes out with it.
Asparagus reportedly also has aphrodisiac properties. Which is contradictory to my theory that it may have led to the extinction of the Martian race, because one would think that were it an aphrodisiac, those Martians would be bumpin' uglies all night long, thus perpetuating the species. One would also think that the pro-creation factor would probably out pace the mortality rates, however even that is not definitive because the intelligence factor is still unknown. After all who builds a society around the cultivation of a weed that makes your urine smell? Not to mention that the smell factor would probably counter-balance the aphrodesiactical properties, (yes I just made that word up) thus negating the pro-creative factors, allowing the mortality rate to prevail.
Maybe I am going to re-think my original statement that our problems have been solved. After all, The Answer Is Always More Cowbell!
4 years ago