Tuesday, October 21, 2008


So I am watching an unplugged version of the Black Crowes on the Telee yesterday. I like me some Black Crowes, saw them in concert and quite enjoyed them. I enjoy listening to Chris Robinson orate on his music. He says some pretty funny and outrageous stuff that really makes you think.

But then I start thinking about when I went to the concert with some buddies of mine and the wife says to me...."if Kate Hudson is there, you can't run off with her." Don't get me wrong, I am waaaaay better lookin' than Chris Robinson, but I don't have a kick ass band, she would never go for me. But then she goes and dumps Chris for Owen Wilson.

Ok I get it, he's cute with the blond hair and all, but his nose is just atrocious. No worries it's his trademark I wouldn't expect him to change that, plus hell, he got Kate to leave Chris so there has to be something to this guy.

The point I am going for here is this. I am watching this concert and thinking, I like the Black Crowes, so what if it were the case that I was Kate Hudson and I split from Chris. Would I automatically have to stop liking the Black Crowes? How does that really work? Now granted, she cheated on Chris, so I don't necessarily think that she has to stop liking the Black Crowes music. I am working on the assumption that she actually did like them, after all she was married to Chris Robinson, I would hope she was into his music.

Of course he may think, "Eff that little whore, she don't get to listen to me pour my soul into my craft." Maybe Chris actually told her to her face, "Eff you, you little whore, don't you ever buy my album or come to my shows ever again." In that case I could see Kate having a bit of a dilemma on her hands.

Then I gotta wonder if Chris would stop going to her movies. What if he really likes Matthew McConaghey, (let's say that he scores his pot from Matt), does he never watch that movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 days ever again? (Not that it's a great movie to begin with, but for the sake of the discussion, Chris likes it.) Then what?

What about Heather Locklear? Does she have to hate on Bon Jovi because Richie Sambora went and banged Denise Richards? Who could stop listening to the Jovi? Not me! So how does Heather cope with that, I mean her Ipod would take a serious hit if she has to stop liking Bon Jovi. For Denise Richards she gets the bonus of still having an Ipod full of rockin' Bon Jovi, AND she is no longer obliged to endure having to watch Two and Half Men. I can't see how she loses in this vignette. But poor Heather she has to turn to little man David Spade for her needs. Could you imagine those two competing for mirror time? I almost think that his hair demands as much attention as Heather's does. Don't hate him because he's beautiful Heather, men's hair needs love too.

1 comment:

Kristina P. said...

You are so existential. Excellent questions, my friend.

And I loved that you used the word "whore" a lot.