Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Poop Face

Ever read the children's book Everyone Poops? Not me. I'm not really sure why I haven't read it. I have four children that I had to potty train. One would think that I would have referenced this famous tome through this process, but I didn't. I'm sure it's a wonderful book, but I just never really felt the urge to read such a thing.

What I am building up to here is this. I have this mirror in the bathroom, that quite frankly isn't the most flattering thing to have in the particular position in which it is located. It's a full length mirror that is located on the wall adjacent to the toilet. Thus, when one sits down on the commode, were you to glance to your left, the scenery, in my case anyway, isn't a pretty one. No one really wants this visual of me, but I promise the following anecdote is a pretty funny one if you can get past the horror of my bare ass sitting on the throne, reflecting in the mirror.

So I'm sitting there minding my own business, perusing through The Secret, (did I just say that out loud?) since there is nothing else to read. So I'm thinking to myself good thoughts, as per the advice the book is giving me, that this is going to end well without blowing a gasket or worse a coronary event. Because, as you all well know, this requires some physical exertion if you will, to complete ones duties (pun intended).

So I'm workin' it out, then due to a momentary lapse of reason, I looked to my left and I noticed the face I was pulling. It then occurs to me that I have seen this expression before many times. Perhaps I blacked out momentarily, but I flashed back to all those years of raising my children and the chuckles I used to get out of watching them pull that same face. It was the poop face. I have seen it literally thousands of times but never on my own face.

There's no mistaking it. If you have children you know when they are stinkin' it up just by the look that comes across their precious little face, and it's funny. If you have access to a human baby, I highly suggest you watch them when they're dookin' it up. Then take it a step further. Put a mirror in proximity of your toilet and pay attention to your face while you get after it. That's some pretty funny shit!

5 comments:

thepworth said...

omg did I just read that about my boss? no wonder you don't want to cover that hearing for me. you're too busy sharing your wonderful stories with the world.

Rich said...

Sad but true.

Boyd said...

poop face is like air guitar face. Everyone does it, and it is always awesome. And Richard, you are a beatiful man and should never be ashamed of the wonderful body God gave you.

Kristina P. said...

You had me at cowbell. And then you lost me momentarily when you mentioned "The Secret", but then that cute poopy baby face had me again.

Your blog is hilarious! You are the 3rd guy to post in the past couple of days. I've hit the male trifecta!

I will definitely add you to my reader and blogroll! Here's to poop and cupcakes!

Jordan said...

I have to be honest, this made me chuckle out loud. It's funny because it's true!!!